"All I want is you, will you be my bride
Take me by the hand and stand by my side
All I want is you will you stay with me?
Hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea"
The movie "Juno" opens with this song... the tune is catchy and of course the lyrics are great... the romantic in me really loved it I guess... The song just goes on and on about what "I" would be if "you" were something... very cheesy and feel-goody... lol... a sense of contentment and security by "holding in your arms" and at the same time, a sense of nonchalance and danger by "swaying like the sea"... I believe that the concept is too romantic... like in the dreams... too unworldly... nevertheless it is this idea that makes one hopeful for a better tomorrow... to look for the "one" to whom one can say "All I want is you..." and who says the same thing back!
Life is like a meandering river... or a stream? It takes us through the exquisite beauty of mother nature... forests, trees, beautiful sunsets, sunrises... nice neighborhoods... and of course there will always be rocking of the boat... dangerous terrain... rough waters... it shows us everything... and makes the ride interesting, sad, joyous... and all the other emotions you can think of... :)
Is it in the human mind to perceive what it internally feels, in the nature outside? I guess so... Consider a rainy day! If you are internally feeling sad, you get a feeling that the nature is shedding silent tears with you... The same rain accompanied with a fresh smell of moist earth can initiate a feeling of a cleansing away the sadness and looking forward to a new, happy tomorrow, if you are internally feeling optimistic... The same rain can generate a feeling that the nature is equally depressed with black clouds hanging low, looking towards impending gloom, if you are feeling dismally despondent... If you are spending time with a loved one, you will feel like dancing in the rain and appreciate that the nature is tossing tiny goblets of joy at you and your lover... It is just so fascinating, at the same time, astounding, how differently the mind comprehends the same fact, based on its current state.
A spate of disconnected thoughts and I guess I felt a sudden impulse to write... Am I being too cut-off from reality these days? My writing might suggest so, though I do not think I am... :P
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Interesting theory for love?
Valentine's day is approaching... tomorrow, in fact! Love is in the air... everything seems to be affected... starting from the romantic music playing in the malls, coffee shops around the city, to "Every kiss begins with K" and similar series of ads on TV, to a new set of spam mails of the "Give them a rock this Valentine's day, the one they've ALWAYS wanted" sort in my mailbox, to couples holding hands and kissing, walking around... even the weather seems to have gotten into the mood, with beautiful sunsets and what not! Interesting... lightens my mood and makes me happy on one hand... and a tad bit sad on the other... oh well, anyways...
I took a break from work and decided to attend one of the courses offered at the learning center at my company... the course was interesting to say the least. But, to sit through a whole day of class... Oh My God! I did not know it would be such a daunting task... Had to browse through websites, chat with friends, get some work done AND of course, depend on lots of caffeine to keep myself awake and concentrate on the class. When browsing through the web, I came across this article, that gave advice on love.
When do you actually realise that you are in love with a "special someone", or if someone is in love with you? I am using "in love with someone" and not "love someone"... there is a difference! As they say, actions speak louder than words... As romantic, engaging and seductive as the words of the "special someone" might be, no words can take the place of concrete action and behavior.
- Do they listen to you?
Actually listening and not just hearing to what someone is saying... listening to their point of view, their issues and anything they have to say is very important. If you really love someone, this is the first thing that you would involuntarily do! The same goes with the "other person" as well. If they really are "in love" with you, they would LISTEN to you.
- Do they follow through on their promises and commitments?
This is one of the most important characteristics of a person... how well they keep the promises and commitments they make to you... how often do they go back on them!
- Do they at least attempt to express interest in your interests and likes -- even if it isn't their thing?
LOL... don't you think this is quite important as well? I know being honest about everything you feel is important... nevertheless, if you really love someone, you involuntarily tend to develop an interest in their interests and likes... for example, even though you might be really bored with some specific sort of movie genre, or music in general, you would try to develop interest in it just so you can get to know the other person well... and spend more time with them! The key thing is that this is a two-way street...
- Do they sometimes go out of their way to demonstrate their care for you?
Is this not simply romantic? If not in every step, showing that you care at least once a while is a really significant aspect in a relationship.
- Do they show up for the relationship -- treating it and you as a priority?
As I already said, a relationship is a two-way street. Prioritising different aspects of life and being clear and discussing about them lets you know how much they actually care about you.
- Do they tell you how they feel? Can they give you space when you need to take it?
Of course, open communication is the baseline of any successful relationship. Of course, every person needs space, but opening up to someone you are in love with is quite important.
- Do they respect your requests, thoughts and values -- even if they don't always agree?
Mutual respect even in case of disagreement... tough, but it just makes it all worth it!
- Are they willing to forgo -- or at least address -- their own addictions, distractions and personal hang-ups that keep them distant from you? Are they honest with you?
Being honest about feelings is really a basic issue when it comes to love. Addressing one's own short-comings and trying to overcome them or work through them together shows how much one loves the other person.
- Do they love you for who you are -- not simply for what you provide or do for them?
This question is quite interesting too... food for some thought here ;)
And I would repeat that all of these have to come from BOTH the persons involved. Though I am not much experienced, just sharing a few of my thoughts here I guess... ;) Can I take a shot at being a therapist? Or do I myself need one? lol...
I took a break from work and decided to attend one of the courses offered at the learning center at my company... the course was interesting to say the least. But, to sit through a whole day of class... Oh My God! I did not know it would be such a daunting task... Had to browse through websites, chat with friends, get some work done AND of course, depend on lots of caffeine to keep myself awake and concentrate on the class. When browsing through the web, I came across this article, that gave advice on love.
When do you actually realise that you are in love with a "special someone", or if someone is in love with you? I am using "in love with someone" and not "love someone"... there is a difference! As they say, actions speak louder than words... As romantic, engaging and seductive as the words of the "special someone" might be, no words can take the place of concrete action and behavior.
- Do they listen to you?
Actually listening and not just hearing to what someone is saying... listening to their point of view, their issues and anything they have to say is very important. If you really love someone, this is the first thing that you would involuntarily do! The same goes with the "other person" as well. If they really are "in love" with you, they would LISTEN to you.
- Do they follow through on their promises and commitments?
This is one of the most important characteristics of a person... how well they keep the promises and commitments they make to you... how often do they go back on them!
- Do they at least attempt to express interest in your interests and likes -- even if it isn't their thing?
LOL... don't you think this is quite important as well? I know being honest about everything you feel is important... nevertheless, if you really love someone, you involuntarily tend to develop an interest in their interests and likes... for example, even though you might be really bored with some specific sort of movie genre, or music in general, you would try to develop interest in it just so you can get to know the other person well... and spend more time with them! The key thing is that this is a two-way street...
- Do they sometimes go out of their way to demonstrate their care for you?
Is this not simply romantic? If not in every step, showing that you care at least once a while is a really significant aspect in a relationship.
- Do they show up for the relationship -- treating it and you as a priority?
As I already said, a relationship is a two-way street. Prioritising different aspects of life and being clear and discussing about them lets you know how much they actually care about you.
- Do they tell you how they feel? Can they give you space when you need to take it?
Of course, open communication is the baseline of any successful relationship. Of course, every person needs space, but opening up to someone you are in love with is quite important.
- Do they respect your requests, thoughts and values -- even if they don't always agree?
Mutual respect even in case of disagreement... tough, but it just makes it all worth it!
- Are they willing to forgo -- or at least address -- their own addictions, distractions and personal hang-ups that keep them distant from you? Are they honest with you?
Being honest about feelings is really a basic issue when it comes to love. Addressing one's own short-comings and trying to overcome them or work through them together shows how much one loves the other person.
- Do they love you for who you are -- not simply for what you provide or do for them?
This question is quite interesting too... food for some thought here ;)
And I would repeat that all of these have to come from BOTH the persons involved. Though I am not much experienced, just sharing a few of my thoughts here I guess... ;) Can I take a shot at being a therapist? Or do I myself need one? lol...
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